(http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3190/3113348458_a4ef5270fa_o.jpg)
It's a romantic full moon, when Pedro said, "Hey, mamacita, let's do Weeweechu."
Oh no, not now, let's look at the moon!" said Rosita.
Oh, c'mon baby, let's you and I do Weeweechu. I love you and it's the perfect time," Pedro begged.
"But I wanna just hold your hand and watch the moon." replied Rosita.
Please, corazoncito, just once, do Weeweechu with me."
Rosita looked at Pedro and said, "OK, one time, we'll do Weeweechu."
Pedro grabbed his guitar and they both sang.....
"Weeweechu a Merry Christmas, Weeweechu a Merry Christmas, Weeweechu a Merry Christmas, and a Happy New Year."
MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!!
I cannot decide if I am offended , or just terrified...
[clap]
Deck the harrs with berrs of horry
fa ra ra ra ra
ra ra ra ra
Tis the season to be gorry
fa ra ra ra ra
ra ra ra ra
A Christmas Story ;D
I'm sure I'll have to go to the apology thread after this one but it's just too funny. Oh, I'm a Christmas guy too so don't look into this poem to deep, like I said just funny is all.
'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through my house
I tiptoed in secret, just like a louse.
Past the stockings I snuck, toward the bathroom, my lair,
in hopes that St. Nicholas would not be squatting in there!
The children were nestled all snug in their beds,
while visions of flatulence danced in my head.
And me in my 'kerchief, and removing my cap,
had now settled down for a long winter's crap.
When out on the roof there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from the throne to see what was the matter.
Away to the window I flew like a flash,
even though a twelve-inch stinker dangled from my ash.
The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow
illuminated my throne room, which really made me go,
when, what to my wondering eyes should emerge,
but a gigantic turd, and a tiny fart splurge.
With a little old stink, so lively and quick,
I knew in a moment it must be St. Nick.
More rapid than eagles, their courses they came,
and he grunted and wiggled, and called them by name:
"Now Pooper! Now Dooper!
Now, Shitter and Vixen!
On, Crapper! On, Pudding!
On, Logger and Shitzen!
To the top of the toilet!
To the top of the wall!
Now flush away! flush away!
Flush away all!"
As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane fly,
I wiped my ass with them so briskly, it near made me cry,
so up to the house-top the deposit, it grew,
with the toilet full of chocolate pudding, and tootsie rolls, too.
And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof
the prancing and pawing of each little poop.
As I drew in my head, and turned with a start,
down the chimney St. Nicholas came, with a big, loud fart.
He was dressed all in fur, from his toes to his crown,
and his clothes were all soiled with ashes and brown.
A bundle of shit he had flung on his back,
and his butt cheeks were ready to burst from his crack.
His eyes -- how they scrunched! His dimples, how red!
His cheeks were like roses, his anus, it bled!
His straining little mouth was drawn up like a loop,
and the beard on his chin was covered with poop!
The stump of a dumped pipe he held tight in his teeth,
and the stench of it encircled his head like a wreath.
He had a little 'ole face and a little round belly,
that shook when he farted, like a bowl full of jelly.
He was chubby and plump, a frequently constipated old elf,
and I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself.
A wink of his eye and a twist of his ass
soon let me to know there was nothing left but gas.
He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,
and emptied his bowels, then turned with a jerk.
After filling the shitter and pinching his nose,
he gave a quick nod, and up the chimney he rose.
He sprang to his sleigh, and to his team let loose a fart,
And away they all flew like shoppers at Wal-Mart.
But I heard him exclaim, somewhat like a grump,
"Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good dump!"
Quote from: dosgatos on December 16, 2008, 08:15:52 AM
[clap]
Deck the harrs with berrs of horry
fa ra ra ra ra
ra ra ra ra
Tis the season to be gorry
fa ra ra ra ra
ra ra ra ra
A Christmas Story ;D
"'Frageelay'...that's Italian."
Guess the Christmas Song:
(http://www.santalady.com/xmasgame.gif)
OMG! [roll] [laugh]
#19 is a little disturbing
now how could anyone be terrified of a sweet little pair of darling chihuahuas?
i think the the disturbing one is # 5 ouch!
Quote from: RED on December 16, 2008, 10:54:48 AM
now how could anyone be terrified of a sweet little pair of darling chihuahuas?
Point taken [thumbsup] Since I should not be terrified, I shall consider myself offended ;D
Quote from: muskrat on December 16, 2008, 08:22:12 AM
I'm sure I'll have to go to the apology thread after this one but it's just too funny. Oh, I'm a Christmas guy too so don't look into this poem to deep, like I said just funny is all.
Dax, that's disgusting. [puke]
[laugh] [laugh] [laugh]
cdc
Quote from: L'Avatar D'Jour on December 16, 2008, 11:54:15 AM
<groan>
Whaaa? Whaaa? Where's the love?
Slag:....offended????
Whaaa? Whaaa? Where's the love?
Me and my dirty mind. I thought WeeWeeChu meant ....
[laugh] [laugh] [laugh]
cdc
Quote from: muskrat on December 16, 2008, 08:22:12 AM
I'm sure I'll have to go to the apology thread after this one but it's just too funny. Oh, I'm a Christmas guy too so don't look into this poem to deep, like I said just funny is all.
This is what you call 'potty mouth'!
Quote from: RED on December 16, 2008, 02:58:58 PM
I hope you ran out of soap because I hate eating the stuff [leo]
There used to be a bathroom book with all those stories in them I once had the displeasure of reading whilst a visit to someone's WC. Ribauld I must say.
Oh, and another thing while the Chihuahuas are growling...Meeeester Slag, You are dissing ME now. uh huh, yeah, thas right. I know where you're going with this hanging santa avatar...yep, keep it up with the santa suit-bad-hair thread and the Chihuahuas will deliver a fresh sheeeet in your houseshoes, your headphones, front seat of the Mog and the GH remote!
Ok, I'll steer them clear of the humidor. >:(
Quote from: RED on December 21, 2008, 08:04:05 PM
Oh, and another thing while the Chihuahuas are growling...Meeeester Slag, You are dissing ME now. uh huh, yeah, thas right. I know where you're going with this hanging santa avatar...yep, keep it up with the santa suit-bad-hair thread and the Chihuahuas will deliver a fresh sheeeet in your houseshoes, your headphones, front seat of the Mog and the GH remote!
Ok, I'll steer them clear of the humidor. >:(
have them say hello to Star (doberman) while they're here [thumbsup]
Quote from: Tommy on December 21, 2008, 08:10:08 PM
have them say hello to Star (doberman) while they're here [thumbsup]
Dobermans love warm packaged chicken meat...just sayin.
Quote from: RED on December 21, 2008, 08:11:45 PM
Dobermans love warm packaged chicken meat...just sayin.
yeah, i dont know where i was going with that, she's a big softy
I feel a Red Pictue Post coming on... [evil]
Quote from: Slag on December 22, 2008, 05:18:46 AM
I feel a Red Pictue Post coming on... [evil]
In the
SPIRIT of the season I hope
(RED says as he raises his eyebrow at the thought)
Szechuan Chihuahua
1 to 1 1/2 T oil
3 cloves garlic, whole
5 spring onions, cut into half inch lengths. Use the white bits only.
3/4 inch ginger
About 15 dried chilis - You may find them at Asian food stores. They are red/black, shriveled looking incarnations. They are what make this dish special, so don't substitute with anything else. You can add more or less depending on taste.
300 grams chihuahua meat, cubed.
Marinate the chihuahua in:
2 Tbsp dark soy sauce
1 Tbsp Chinese wine or sherry
1/2 tsp sesame oil
1/2 tsp sugar
dash of pepper and salt
Sauce:
1/2 tsp sesame oil
3 Tbsp dark vinegar
2 Tbsp sugar
1 Tbsp Chinese wine
1 Tbsp dark soy sauce
1 T water
Heat oil in wok until it's really hot. Throw in the garlic, ginger and the spring onion and fry until the kitchen resonates with the fragrance. (About a minute will do.) Now comes the incendiary part. Throw in the dried chilis and fry them with the garlic, ginger and spring onion. Don't worry if it starts to smoke, it's supposed to, and this is what imparts that special taste to this dish. Fry them together for another minute or so, then throw in the chihuahua, which will cook pretty fast because of the high heat you're using. Once it looks done, throw in the sauce, jig everything around to mix, and serve up. Very quick, very tasty. If you're especially masochistic, you can nibble on the chilis, but this is only for the very brave. If a thicker gravy is desired, add in a mixture of 1 tbsp corn flour in 1 tbsp water.
this hurts. Senseless abandoned hurt.
Sounds Yummy--
deeelish, maybe some kitty fries on the side!
The attractive waitress last night recommended cranberry chutney on rotisserie chihuahua ;D
Quote from: Slag on December 24, 2008, 05:39:21 AM
The attractive waitress last night recommended cranberry chutney on rotisserie chihuahua ;D
She sounds experienced in this field.
(http://failblog.files.wordpress.com/2008/12/fail-owned-price-tag-placement-fail.jpg)