Ducati Monster Forum

Kitchen Sink => No Moto Content => Topic started by: Raux on December 03, 2011, 08:28:09 AM

Title: AHHHHHH Minivan Hell...... Help me make a minivan I am not ashamed to drive.
Post by: Raux on December 03, 2011, 08:28:09 AM
PLEASE PLEASE help me out of minivan hell.

I have a 2006 Dodge Grand Caravan EXT with the 3.8l motor.

If I cannot sell it, how can I make it something that handles and I can be not so ashamed to drive?

I was thinking...

lowering it a bit.
17" rims and wider tires
sport springs.
Sport exhaust
cold air intake with hood scoop
it's metallic blue so thinking a white dual racing stripe like a viper (would only do this if I do a full body kit, so unlikely)

my problem is HOW and WHERE to get things like that for a minivan.

I saw one by APC but I can't find anything on them.

I don't want to go airsprings, just shorter front coils and something for the leaf springs in the rear...

any ideas?

Title: Re: AHHHHHH Minivan Hell...... Help me make a minivan I am not ashamed to drive.
Post by: geoffduc on December 03, 2011, 08:54:20 AM
Part X it for a van like mine... [bow_down]

You know you want to... :) :)

Geoff... [coffee]
Title: Re: AHHHHHH Minivan Hell...... Help me make a minivan I am not ashamed to drive.
Post by: sofadriver on December 03, 2011, 08:56:40 AM
you kiddin'?
just put some Ducati stickers on it.
people will know that although you're probably pussy whipped you are managing to maintain some of your manhood.  ;D
Title: Re: AHHHHHH Minivan Hell...... Help me make a minivan I am not ashamed to drive.
Post by: Raux on December 03, 2011, 09:04:10 AM
oh forgot

upgrading the rotors to slotted sport performance with high performance pads.

the stocks are sponges that warp too easily
Title: Re: AHHHHHH Minivan Hell...... Help me make a minivan I am not ashamed to drive.
Post by: Raux on December 03, 2011, 09:06:12 AM
i also read a transmission cooler is a must.


I wish BMW made a sweet handling sporty 7-seat van.
Title: Re: AHHHHHH Minivan Hell...... Help me make a minivan I am not ashamed to drive.
Post by: fastwin on December 03, 2011, 09:12:12 AM
Quote from: sofadriver on December 03, 2011, 08:56:40 AM
you kiddin'?
just put some Ducati stickers on it.
people will know that although you're probably pussy whipped you are managing to maintain some of your manhood.  ;D

What he said. [thumbsup]

I even slipped a small Ducati Corse sticker on my 1 year old nephew's stroller and it took his parents like 6 months to notice it. Can't start them on the right path too early! [thumbsup] [Dolph]
Title: Re: AHHHHHH Minivan Hell...... Help me make a minivan I am not ashamed to drive.
Post by: zarn02 on December 03, 2011, 11:11:16 AM
If I were to upgrade a minivan, I'd go for things that folks on the street won't be able to really notice without careful inspection.

Brakes, suspension, maybe wheels and tires if I could find something that wasn't too flash looking.

Make it handle nicely and perform better without making it look like a tuner on the outside.

Because a tarted up minivan just seems a bit sad.
Title: Re: AHHHHHH Minivan Hell...... Help me make a minivan I am not ashamed to drive.
Post by: Raux on December 03, 2011, 12:23:37 PM
Quote from: zarn02 on December 03, 2011, 11:11:16 AM
If I were to upgrade a minivan, I'd go for things that folks on the street won't be able to really notice without careful inspection.

Brakes, suspension, maybe wheels and tires if I could find something that wasn't too flash looking.

Make it handle nicely and perform better without making it look like a tuner on the outside.

Because a tarted up minivan just seems a bit sad.
i do agree
but finding this stuff.     [bang]
Title: Re: AHHHHHH Minivan Hell...... Help me make a minivan I am not ashamed to drive.
Post by: lethe on December 03, 2011, 12:31:39 PM
build one of these instead
VW Van with a GT3 Engine (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e6rmH4vERsM#)
Title: Re: AHHHHHH Minivan Hell...... Help me make a minivan I am not ashamed to drive.
Post by: Raux on December 03, 2011, 12:39:28 PM
Still have to find the damn parts
Title: Re: AHHHHHH Minivan Hell...... Help me make a minivan I am not ashamed to drive.
Post by: ZLTFUL on December 03, 2011, 12:55:08 PM
I have an online acquaintance that has a 12 second quarter mile Pontiac Transport. It would be a better option as they make a SHIT ton of GM 3.8L supercharged go fast goodies. If they can build a 3.8L that pushes a front wheel drive Pontiac Grand Prix to 8 second quarter miles no reason you couldn't do it too.

Of course you could always track down a Chevy Astro van and stuff a 350 into it. Been done tons of times.
Title: Re: AHHHHHH Minivan Hell...... Help me make a minivan I am not ashamed to drive.
Post by: ducatiz on December 03, 2011, 01:02:43 PM
some minivans have ok bodies

lower the suspension and black the whole thing out... paint it black, dark windows, the hwole 9 yards

put a racing stripe on it

hire some strippers to ride around with you.. if you have 2-3 hot strippers, no one cares, even if it's a buick regal.
Title: Re: AHHHHHH Minivan Hell...... Help me make a minivan I am not ashamed to drive.
Post by: Triple J on December 03, 2011, 01:29:53 PM
No matter what you do it's stil a minivan. Save your money for something cool.
Title: Re: AHHHHHH Minivan Hell...... Help me make a minivan I am not ashamed to drive.
Post by: RAT900 on December 03, 2011, 02:20:09 PM
don't put a pedabear sticker on it 

or any stickers like "don't laugh your daughter is in the back"
Title: Re: AHHHHHH Minivan Hell...... Help me make a minivan I am not ashamed to drive.
Post by: KnightofNi on December 03, 2011, 02:20:34 PM
do this

http://www.turbovan.net/van.html (http://www.turbovan.net/van.html)
Title: Re: AHHHHHH Minivan Hell...... Help me make a minivan I am not ashamed to drive.
Post by: muskrat on December 03, 2011, 02:37:18 PM
Quote from: RAT900 on December 03, 2011, 02:20:09 PM
don't put a pedabear sticker on it 


[laugh] [laugh]
Title: Re: AHHHHHH Minivan Hell...... Help me make a minivan I am not ashamed to drive.
Post by: sno_duc on December 04, 2011, 09:38:32 AM
The Ashes Challenge Part 1 - Top Gear - BBC (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F7hfSiYQQF4#)
First 2 minutes  [evil]  ;D
Title: Re: AHHHHHH Minivan Hell...... Help me make a minivan I am not ashamed to drive.
Post by: Goat_Herder on December 04, 2011, 09:51:51 AM
Quote from: Triple J on December 03, 2011, 01:29:53 PM
No matter what you do it's stil a minivan. Save your money for something cool.
Triple J is correct....    EXCEPT he forgot there is one thing.  The ONLY thing that will make your van cool.























I present to you the A-Team van paint scheme!  [laugh]
(http://www.photobasement.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/02/ateamvan.jpg)
Title: Re: AHHHHHH Minivan Hell...... Help me make a minivan I am not ashamed to drive.
Post by: Goat_Herder on December 04, 2011, 09:53:20 AM
Or you can get a license plate holder that reads "I'd Rather be Riding My Ducati".  People would understand.
Title: Re: AHHHHHH Minivan Hell...... Help me make a minivan I am not ashamed to drive.
Post by: sno_duc on December 04, 2011, 10:13:31 AM
QuoteI present to you the A-Team van paint scheme!  [laugh]
It also helps to have Mr. T riding shotgun...........................................to take "Pity on the Fools"  ;) we need a Mr.T smiley, mohawk and gold bling
Title: Re: AHHHHHH Minivan Hell...... Help me make a minivan I am not ashamed to drive.
Post by: The Architect on December 04, 2011, 10:49:46 AM
You own a minivan?  Go kill yourself!





just kidding, a couple of beers bring out the old new yorker in me 
Title: Re: AHHHHHH Minivan Hell...... Help me make a minivan I am not ashamed to drive.
Post by: Raux on December 04, 2011, 10:56:10 AM
Quote from: The Architect on December 04, 2011, 10:49:46 AM
You own a minivan?  Go kill yourself!





just kidding, a couple of beers bring out the old new yorker in me 

only cause the Acura MDX turned out to be complete crap.
Title: Re: AHHHHHH Minivan Hell...... Help me make a minivan I am not ashamed to drive.
Post by: Raux on December 04, 2011, 10:59:23 AM
to be honest. my main concern is safer driving/handling on the autobahn.

evasive maneuvers in vans at 85mph aren't so great with stock setup.
Title: Re: AHHHHHH Minivan Hell...... Help me make a minivan I am not ashamed to drive.
Post by: sno_duc on December 04, 2011, 12:05:24 PM
Quote from: Raux on December 04, 2011, 10:59:23 AM
to be honest. my main concern is safer driving/handling on the autobahn.

evasive maneuvers in vans at 85mph aren't so great with stock setup.
Springs, shocks, and change out the rubber bushings to ureathane.


off topic;: Where in germany do you live? The wife and I plan on picking up her next BMW in Munich, and dropping it off in Frankfurt.
Title: Re: AHHHHHH Minivan Hell...... Help me make a minivan I am not ashamed to drive.
Post by: Raux on December 04, 2011, 12:20:21 PM
Quote from: sno_duc on December 04, 2011, 12:05:24 PM
Springs, shocks, and change out the rubber bushings to ureathane.


off topic;: Where in germany do you live? The wife and I plan on picking up her next BMW in Munich, and dropping it off in Frankfurt.

Kaiserslautern.

about 1hr from frankfurt.
Title: Re: AHHHHHH Minivan Hell...... Help me make a minivan I am not ashamed to drive.
Post by: Raux on December 04, 2011, 12:25:17 PM
Quote from: sno_duc on December 04, 2011, 12:05:24 PM
Springs, shocks, and change out the rubber bushings to ureathane.


off topic;: Where in germany do you live? The wife and I plan on picking up her next BMW in Munich, and dropping it off in Frankfurt.

ok springs shocks and bushings.

springs. i think front springs can be had by eibach. lower it about 1 - 1.5in
shocks.. suppose any sport shocks the right length
bushings?
rear springs are leaf springs I think.. what to do there?
Title: Re: AHHHHHH Minivan Hell...... Help me make a minivan I am not ashamed to drive.
Post by: RAT900 on December 05, 2011, 12:44:25 AM
Quote from: sno_duc on December 04, 2011, 09:38:32 AM
The Ashes Challenge Part 1 - Top Gear - BBC (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F7hfSiYQQF4#)
First 2 minutes  [evil]  ;D

that whole thing was hysterical  [clap]
Title: Re: AHHHHHH Minivan Hell...... Help me make a minivan I am not ashamed to drive.
Post by: ungeheuer on December 05, 2011, 01:34:26 AM
Quote from: RAT900 on December 05, 2011, 12:44:25 AM
that whole thing was hysterical  [clap]
The Poms cheated  [cheeky]
Title: Re: AHHHHHH Minivan Hell...... Help me make a minivan I am not ashamed to drive.
Post by: Buckethead on December 05, 2011, 06:23:40 AM
Quote from: Raux on December 04, 2011, 12:25:17 PM
ok springs shocks and bushings.

springs. i think front springs can be had by eibach. lower it about 1 - 1.5in
shocks.. suppose any sport shocks the right length
bushings?
rear springs are leaf springs I think.. what to do there?

I would be surprised if you didn't have struts at least up front. You may have to get creative and find struts for something that's a bit heavier/more sport oriented and then cross-check dimensions.

As for the rear, you can find leaf spring helpers around. Check off-road and Jeep parts sections. Summit, Jeg's, etc. That'll help stiffen up the rear. The BIG thing you're going to need, probably both front and rear, is a stiffer anti-roll bar. Especially with as tall as that thing is. Not sure if anyone out there already makes one, but if you can find a stocker around, it shouldn't be too hard to cut/reinforce/splice.
Title: Re: AHHHHHH Minivan Hell...... Help me make a minivan I am not ashamed to drive.
Post by: JEFF_H on December 05, 2011, 12:07:27 PM
SCRUBS - Turk and the mini van (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zFz12xoa5oA#)
Title: Re: AHHHHHH Minivan Hell...... Help me make a minivan I am not ashamed to drive.
Post by: dropstharockalot on December 05, 2011, 12:38:58 PM
Quote from: zarn02 on December 03, 2011, 11:11:16 AM
Because a tarted up minivan just seems a bit sad.
This.

Unless you go full-on '70s Boogie Van...

(http://images.hemmings.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/06/06122008cruisein_7705_resized.jpg)

(http://www.knfilters.com/images/press/pirates-of-the-caravan2.jpg)

Shag carpet, fold-out bed, lava lamps...
(http://s11.allstarpics.net/images/orig/j/q/jqen14b22a7pa2p4.jpg)
Title: Re: AHHHHHH Minivan Hell...... Help me make a minivan I am not ashamed to drive.
Post by: Raux on December 05, 2011, 01:09:44 PM
problem solved. selling it soon.
Title: Re: AHHHHHH Minivan Hell...... Help me make a minivan I am not ashamed to drive.
Post by: 77south on December 05, 2011, 01:26:22 PM
The biggest upgrade you could get for any van is an airbrushed mural of one of Frank Frazetta's paintings.
Title: Re: AHHHHHH Minivan Hell...... Help me make a minivan I am not ashamed to drive.
Post by: Speedbag on December 05, 2011, 03:40:11 PM
Quote from: dropstharockalot on December 05, 2011, 12:38:58 PM

Unless you go full-on '70s Boogie Van...



Hell yes.  [thumbsup]
Title: Re: AHHHHHH Minivan Hell...... Help me make a minivan I am not ashamed to drive.
Post by: the_Journeyman on December 05, 2011, 05:18:02 PM
Try this:
(http://www.rctech.net/forum/attachments/painting-designs-graphics-photography/313856d1203632652-vector-mystery-machine-mystery-machine.jpg)

JM
Title: Re: AHHHHHH Minivan Hell...... Help me make a minivan I am not ashamed to drive.
Post by: thought on December 05, 2011, 10:36:20 PM
How about getting one of those sport wagons instead?  Audi makes some nice looking ones and they should be a lot cheaper in Germany than in the US.  They have close to the same utility as a minivan/suv and will wreck them in terms of handling/power/mpg.
Title: Re: AHHHHHH Minivan Hell...... Help me make a minivan I am not ashamed to drive.
Post by: Raux on December 05, 2011, 10:53:41 PM
well to be honest, looks like i'll be back down to just three kids, so no need for the minivan.
Will be for sale in the near future. YEAH... my minivan persecution is over.
Title: Re: AHHHHHH Minivan Hell...... Help me make a minivan I am not ashamed to drive.
Post by: The Bacon Junkie on December 05, 2011, 11:06:40 PM
Where did the other one(s) go?

Sold on fleaBay?!  ???


  ;D





[bacon]
Title: Re: AHHHHHH Minivan Hell...... Help me make a minivan I am not ashamed to drive.
Post by: Raux on December 05, 2011, 11:15:21 PM
Quote from: The Bacon Junkie on December 05, 2011, 11:06:40 PM
Where did the other one(s) go?

Sold on fleaBay?!  ???


  ;D





[bacon]

trust me, with a background check, i'll get no bids.

Title: Re: AHHHHHH Minivan Hell...... Help me make a minivan I am not ashamed to drive.
Post by: slowpoke13 on December 06, 2011, 06:42:50 AM
Best possible mod for a minivan is to cover the whole thing with a 5-gallon jerry can of gasoline and add a match.
Title: Re: AHHHHHH Minivan Hell...... Help me make a minivan I am not ashamed to drive.
Post by: ducatiz on December 06, 2011, 07:35:40 AM
Quote from: dropstharockalot on December 05, 2011, 12:38:58 PM
This.

Unless you go full-on '70s Boogie Van...
Shag carpet, fold-out bed, lava lamps...
(http://s11.allstarpics.net/images/orig/j/q/jqen14b22a7pa2p4.jpg)


MMM... pineapple butt lotion...