Update the crash ticker? Hell no!

[Drunken Monkey]

So this AM I go down to the garage and start up the scooter.

I'm wheeling it back out of the garage and as I get it down out the garage door and onto the street, my foot slips on the metal PG&E plate.

Naturally, this results in an instant "whiskey throttle" and the bike surges forward. Which results in more throttle, etc.

So I'm getting dragged through the garage at about 15 MPH, all the while staring at my right hand, commanding it to "LET GO DAMMIT"

Eventually my hand listens to my brain.

Amazingly the scooter misses all the dangerous crap I have on both sides of the garage and instead wedges itself into the boxes filled with old clothes at the waaaay back of the garage.

Wife runs down to see what the hell just happened, to find me laughing my ass off about 10 feet from the scooter with a path of destruction wrought by me as I (not the scooter) banged into various items.

End result: Very minor damage to scooter (one small ding) and bruised pride on my part 

[jimboecv]

Scooter people...

[ROBsS4R]

So do we need to have a new crash ticker. Crashes related to not being on your motorcycle 

[Drunken Monkey]

Scooter people...

Them things are dangerous I tells ya. We should go after the people who sell them to the unsuspecting public 

[desmoquattro]

Gives a new meaning to "Twist-n-Go"...

Glad you're OK.

[mostrobelle]

First off, I know you well enough not too feel too bad for ya.  In fact, I'm just gonna laugh at you a little right now.  Cuz I would have laughed a lot harder had I been standing there and watching you.   ...and, no, I wouldn't have helped--not that there's much I could have done. 

Now that I have the mockery out of the way, the answer to your question is no.  You don't get to count this one.  The 'ticker is primarily meant for "moving violations".  Had you taken the scooter too fast (yeah, riiiiiight!) through a corner and found yourself on your ass, then we'd count it.  Every now and then we'll count a little, slow gravel lowside as a 'ticker-worthy incident.  Usually it involves someone pulling over for an RV and eatin' dirt.  Those kind depend on the person eating dirt and under what circumstances they did their face-plant.  Launching a scooter into boxes and a Maytag simply doesn't cut it.  You're going to have to try a lot harder than that next time.   

[Spidey]

You want me to come over there and show you how to crash that thing properly? 

BTW, laughin' my ass off over here at the visual. 

[jimboecv]

Unsuspecting and scooter go hand in hand.  My case and point; You.

Your turn.

[Michael Moore]

I know it isn't polite to laugh at a fellow scooter-hooligan, but the visual was just too good.

Bummer about the banged up scoot though. I guess this is your cute to get the flat black rattle can and put a bunch of skulls on it. 

[Drunken Monkey]

Bummer about the banged up scoot though. I guess this is your cute to get the flat black rattle can and put a bunch of skulls on it. 

That's the odd part: One teeny ding on the front fender was the total extent of the damage, despite the dramatics.

[Michael Moore]

That's the odd part: One teeny ding on the front fender was the total extent of the damage, despite the dramatics.

Whew. Good thing you don't have to replace the fender. Those things are a real PITA to get off - you have to pull the whole fork assembly to unbolt the stupid plastic fender.

[somegirl]

Please install a camera in your garage for the next time!

[Drunken Monkey]

Unsuspecting and scooter go hand in hand.  My case and point; You.

Your turn.

Like your helmet and me taking a dump in it.

How'd I do?   

[Grampa]

you need a garage cam



so's we could have all seen this

[Drunken Monkey]

you need a garage cam
so's we could have all seen this

Artist's rendition below: