Corrupt a wish

[Sgt_H]

Granted!  But the automated litter box scares the shit out of your cat.  Litterally, and into your riding boots.

I wish that Spidey didn't hate boobies.

Granted!  Spidey Loves Boobies... Yours!  And now you can't keep him away from you.  He's constantly following you around and trying to look in your windows to see your man boobies.

I wish I could see female college cheerleader boobies whenever I wanted.

[jclin]

I wish I could see female college cheerleader boobies whenever I wanted.

Granted. Every time you want, the nearest cheerleader shows you her boobies, but for some reason, every cheerleader you encounter either weighs 90 lbs. or is 300 lbs. Finally, one girl is pissed that she has to show her breasts and decides to beat you with them. You die what should be a glorious death...but really it's just sad.

I wish I wasn't so drunk...

[krolik]

Poof!  You're no longer drunk, just horribly hung over.

I wish Fry  a "Happy Birthday!"

[He Man]

Granted, Fry has a happy birthday and ends up with an BEAUTIFUL lady in bed which he remembers having sex with her in the dark. But when he wakes up she is really a he with a pee pee.

I wish i could have perfect semesters for the next 2.5 years of college and meet great friends and really cool and pretty girls....who dont have penises

[Drunken Monkey]

I wish i could have perfect semesters for the next 2.5 years of college and meet great friends and really cool and pretty girls....who dont have penises

Granted, you have an awesome time in divinity school, being total chaste and hanging out with the equally chaste (and cool & pretty) nuns.

I wish they'd shit can my boss due to incompetence. Oh wait, That happened today 

I wish I had more time to work on my bike.

[♣ McKraut ♣]

Granted, you have an awesome time in divinity school, being total chaste and hanging out with the equally chaste (and cool & pretty) nuns.

I wish they'd shit can my boss due to incompetence. Oh wait, That happened today 

I wish I had more time to work on my bike.

granted, but now your bike is transformed into an '01 M600...and the only tools you have are SAE allen wrenches.

i wish i had a g/f that combined all the great traits of all of my ex girlfriends, with none of the bad ones.

[lauramonster]

i wish i had a g/f that combined all the great traits of all of my ex girlfriends, with none of the bad ones.

Granted.  Your best friend just had a sex change and now he's a she.  You make a cute couple.

I wish that for 24 hours I had:

access to a track
the courage to ride to my limit
the ability to learn to ride beyond my limit
the balls to exceed the new limit
....and to not miss ever being able to ride like that again

[NAKID]

Granted, you now have testicles...

I wish I had enough money to do whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted...

[nkryptit]

Granted, you now have testicles...

I wish I had enough money to do whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted...

Granted, but a zombie apocalypse just started and now all your money is better used to keep warm at night.

I wish I could see into the future.

[toaster]

you can, but in the future you see yourself as a sad lonely man with a bmw motorcycle and no home.


i wish the wife would let me get a cool pet... like a snake.

[MendoDave]

She goes and pics a Boa out for you, the same day she takes a million dollar life insurance policy out on you. Snake gets out one night while your sleeping..you know where this is going...
I wish the fridge was always full of good food that I didn't have to buy.

[♣ McKraut ♣]

She goes and pics a Boa out for you, the same day she takes a million dollar life insurance policy out on you. Snake gets out one night while your sleeping..you know where this is going...
I wish the fridge was always full of good food that I didn't have to buy.

granted, but every time you open the door, an excruciating electrical current shocks the shit out of you so much that you lose your appetite.

i wish the weather was perfect in dallas all year 'round instead of 1 month out of the year.

[triangleforge]

It is, they re-name the city San Diego and all  of Southern California moves there.

I wish I was knee deep in a trout stream with a fly rod in my hand.

[Monsterlover]

Oh, you're in a trout stream, but that aint water you're standing in.

I wish the title for my new bike would show up so I can go take it away from it's current owner.

[Timmy Tucker]

Oh, you're in a trout stream, but that aint water you're standing in.

I wish the title for my new bike would show up so I can go take it away from it's current owner.

The title shows up tomorrow, but you're in a car wreck on the way to get the new bike and lose both of your arms.

I wish I had the money to finish college and flight school.