"The incident"

[MendoDave]

ML mentioned that he had an "incident" with whiskey and he doesn't drink the stuff. I think he said "The was an Incident" But he wouldn't elaborate so I told him that I would make my own story about his incident. So with his permission here it is.



One Tuesday night when I was 16, I snuck out of the house to go to a party in the city. I had pre arranged for my friends to pick me up at the bottom of the driveway at 9:30. After the “Rents” had gone to their room to watch TV for the rest of the evening, I started getting myself ready for the outing. Putting on my best pair of ripped jeans, an Iron Maiden concert shirt I had acquired from a friends older brother, & my black leather jacket, I felt I was just about done,  I still needed to put a little jell in my hair to make it look kind of spikey to complete the “look”.

I had done this before, and so at about 9:15 I began by quietly slipping out into the hallway, and slowly closing the bedroom door, turning the handle just right so that it didn’t make that sound like the door had just closed. Then moving through the hall and into the darkened kitchen, I slipped out the back door, giving it the same treatment as my bedroom door. So far so good, I was out of the house and no one was the wiser. Now I just needed to make my way out of the driveway without making any noise walking over the gravel. This was going to be more important when I came home and the “Rents” were asleep, than right now with the TV on. I could see the light changing colors & brightness through the shade on their bedroom window as I quietly crunched down the driveway.

The plan was to come back home about about 5 in the morning or so giving us time to get back into the house before people started waking up. We figured the Party would probably go till 2 or 3 in the morning and then we could maybe get something to eat at Mel’s Diner or some other place before the trains started running again after 4AM

I waited for about 15 minutes before Rick, Matt & Shelly pulled up in Shelly’s car. An old Plymouth Satellite with a bad muffler and bad paint. I would have to remember to have her drop me off down at the end of the street because it was kind of loud like that. At least that was the plan. If I had known at that point that I would actually be coming home from the police station with my mom wrapped in a blanket I would have thought twice about doing this.


We drove down the hill to the BART Station about 10 minutes from my house and parked the car in the lot. From there we would take the train so that we didn’t have to find parking in the city or drive back to the East Bay all drunk & stuff.

So we parked Shelly’s car at the Orinda station, and noticed that the train was already on the platform with the doors standing open. Matt said we had to try and catch that train or we would have to wait another 20 minutes for the next one. So the four of us started running across the mostly empty parking lot and pulled out some fives or tens to buy tickets at the machine. we could have jumped the toll gate but then there could be problems on the exit and we would have to jump there too because you have to run your ticket at the exit gate as well.

As it turned out Rick & Matt already had a ticket with some fare left on it so just Shelly and I had to buy tickets, which saved us some time but not quite enough. So with tickets in hand we raced through the gates and took the escalator up to the platform taking the steps two at a time. About half way up we heard the lady say “the doors are closing”. I bolted onto the platform just in time to see the train pull away with that electric whine coming from the motors these trains make and I watched as the windows became a blur and finally I was looking at the tail end of the train speeding away.

After a bit of huffing & puffing I looked across the tracks to see Shelly & Matt coming up on the other platform in no hurry whatsoever. Matt called out to me & Rick saying “Hey Idiots! That was the Concord train! were going to the city remember?  I started to yell back at him but I noticed that the San Francisco bound train was flying into the station just then and me and Rick were on the wrong side.

So already a little winded, we made record time running down the stairs and up the other escalator to get on the right train, the both of us running into the car completely out of breath. Just after we sat down, the doors closed, and then the train just sat there. After about 2 minutes the conductor came on and garbled something about an incident on board the train and we would be moving in a few minutes.

Rick, spoke saying Great! all that running for nothing! Shelly said, didn’t you read the signs? I said nothing just shaking my head. Matt said check it out! We all looked over at him pointing out the window. Four uniformed cops emerged from the escalator, and strode over to the train about two cars up from us. All the doors on the right side of the train opened and two of the uniformed cops stepped on to the train while the other two waited on the platform. After about two minutes they came back out with a woman in handcuffs and led her toward the stairs. She was a white girl about 19 or 20 or so with long dreadlocks. Her hair was all matted and dirty looking. She wore camouflaged pants and a tie dye tank top under a green hemp fibre jacket.

Before she made it to the stairs she went limp and started dragging her feet. The cops lowered her to the pavement face first and just as some one started yelling at the cops to let her go the “Lady” announced “the doors are closing”. Ten seconds later we were speeding out of the station. 30 seconds later the lights disappeared as we wen’t into the tunnel that separates the east bay bedroom communities from from the more urbanized side of the east bay.

Shelly said I wonder what that was all about? I said, I have no idea. Matt said, She looks like one of those Humboldt Nation people. Humboldt who? I asked. You know, those pot growing hippie types that live up north in the woods. You know the ones always chaining themselves to trees and protesting and stuff? Sort of I said. You mean like Judy Bari? said Shelly. Who’s Judy Bari? Said Rick. A guy sitting across from us from us with a bicycle said, Remember that woman that got blown up by a pipe bomb under her car seat last year? Rick said oh yea. Wasn't that her pipe bomb?
The guy said no man, the logging companies planted that. Why would they do that? asked Matt. Cause her protests are messing with the bottom line the guy said.

The conversation went on like this for the next 20 minutes and finally we came out of the Transbay Tube at  Embarcadero station. Shelly said where is this place again? Matt said, it’s club called Liquid at 16th & Mission. And you’re sure we can get in? Said Rick. No problem, my brother is working the door tonight. He said the head honcho is out of town so it’s cool.



A few minutes later we arrived at 16th street station came up to the street, and walked the two short blocks toward Liquid. The whiff of pot assaulted my nostrils as we crossed Capp St. and once we got close to the club there were small groups of people smoking cigarettes outside the club. The cool kids. I felt intimidated. I had never been here before when the place was open. During the day the doors were chained & padlocked with people going about their usual daytime business. Delivery trucks, the mail man, people with a huge burrito. But at night the atmosphere completely changed.

It was a little foggy in the city. I could see maybe 2 blocks in any direction before the glow of yellow lights from the street lamps was obscured by the fog. This was exiting. Man we were going to party!

The four of us approached the door. The bouncer at the door checking ID’s wasn’t Rick’s brother. I don’t see Vince said Shelly.  Rick said nothing. He walked up to the guy at the door and told him My brother is Vince. Is he working tonight? He said yea but I have the door right now. These three with you? The bouncer was pointing at Me, Shelly and Matt. Rick said yea.
The Bouncer said go on inside, Vince told me you were coming, don’t cause a scene. And just like that we were in.

Inside, the place was dimly lit with back lighting around the bar and various places. There were booths in dark corners, an upper balcony with a catwalk running down one side, and a platform with a DJ mixing some kind of Techno Dance Music.

There were women wearing next to nothing in there. A couple of them looked like vampires. Pale skin, shiny leather. I passed by one of them and saw that she had white contacts that made her eyes look non human. There were strange designs on her skin that glowed in the lights.

We reached the bar and the Bartender said you guys look pretty young,
got any ID? Just then Vince walked up to the bartender and said something to him that I couldn’t hear. The guy nodded and said to us, what are you having?


I wasn’t sure, so I ordered a beer. Rick ordered a Jack & Coke and Matt Said I’ll have one too. I think Shelly ordered a Rum & Coke. We took our drinks and found a spot in a corner and checked out all the weird stuff going on in the place. Vince came over to say Hi to us. He said to Rick. You owe me for this one. Rick nodded at his brother. Vince said that he had to work the door but to have a nice time. 

After a while we had finished our drinks except for Shelly who was still had most of hers left. Matt offered to get us some more and I said I would try a Jack & Coke this time. About halfway through this drink I was feeling pretty good. The techno beat seemed pretty cool and I wasn’t feeling as uptight as I was before.

I offered to get another round and Matt said lets go to the bar and get some shots.  So we each did a shot of Jack and then we did another round of shots, but this time it was wild Turkey. That Wild Turkey didn’t sit quite right going down but I didn’t say anything.

A girl came up next to me at the bar. She had red hair and a small stud in her nose. She looked kind of sweaty all over and there was glitter on her face & arms. She ordered an Apple Martini. I was watching her as she took her drink and added some clear liquid to it from an eye dropper. I said to her what is that? She said it’s the best. It makes the room come alive. Do you wan’t some? She asked. If you come to a party with me you can have some.

I was thinking that she was the most attractive girl in the room. At that point I would have liked nothing more than to go to a party with this girl. So I said yes. I ordered another Jack & Coke and she spritzed my drink with the liquid when It came. What’s your name? I said. Janice she said. I’m Kevin nice to meet you. We made small talk and finished our drinks.

Afterward I felt like I needed some air. I said to Janice I need to go outside for a bit. She said I’m ready to leave why don’t we go to the party. I said sure, and told Matt that I was going to another party and I would catch everybody later. He said you OK? I said yea I probably should have done that shot but I was going to walk it off. Then I left.

We went out the fire exit which led out onto South Van Ness Avenue.  We started walking towards 17th st. Janice pulled out some keys and clicked the key fob. The lights of a SAAB 900 came on. She said get in. I got in. It smelled like leather. This is a nice car I said. It’s brand new isn’t it? She nodded. How did you afford it? I asked. It’s Daddy’s car she said. It’s a lease.

Janice started the engine and pulled out onto the street. I have to stop at my place first and make a call. As we headed in the direction of downtown I felt that I needed to belch. I did so quietly and the taste of whiskey came up and settled under my tongue. It did not taste good. I also started to feel a little strange.

She asked me where I live, and I told her, across the bay in Orinda. I’ve never been over there is it nice? She said. Yea I guess. It’s kind of quiet though, not much to do. I guess that’s why they call it a bedroom community.

She pressed a button and the doors locked. Why did you lock the doors I asked. Because this is kind of a schetchy area she said. We drove a few more blocks on 17th before turning left onto 3rd street. The place looked almost deserted. I wasn’t sure where I was at.

There was a heavy drizzle now. Enough moisture so that the wipers were on intermittently. I stared out the side window and it looked as though it had pine needles on the outside of the glass, but no, it was just rain running off, or were they needles. I couldn’t decide. This had my attention for a long time, and when I looked out the front window again we were in a completely different part of town. We were downtown someplace and Janice pulled into a parking garage. There was a sign that said reserved parking and she pulled into one of the spaces. We’re here she said.

We exited the Parking garage and stepped out into the heavy drizzle. The I looked down at the pavement as we crossed the street. It appeared to have Pine needles all over it but no, those were worms. They were moving all over the wet asphalt, or were they. No, it was just a trick of the light from the street lamps, they couldn’t be worms. They didn’t squish under my feet like worms or, pine needles. I must have stood there for a long time deciding what was going on with the asphalt when Janice called to me from the sidewalk, Come on Kevin my hair is getting wet! I followed her across the street and into the building. I thought I noticed that the bushes planted in front of the building seemed to be sighing but not making any noise.

The doorman said good evening Ms. Dougherty, is this your guest? Yes Frank this is Kevin, ummm. Ames I said. Mr. Ames would you sign in the log for me? I did so. I felt an almost uncontrollable grin start to develop. about what I didn’t know, but if felt like I was going to break out laughing, however I was able to hold it together long enough to get to the elevators.

Janice used a key card to open the elevator door and we got in. She pressed 14 or 15, or was it 17? I don’t remember but we went up and got off on her floor. The elevator stopped at a large room with double swinging glass doors opposite the elevator. She used her key card again on a pad next to the door and they swung open smoothly and noiselessly. She turned right and padded down the short hallway to the door at the end, again using the key card still in her hand on the pad next to the door. It unlocked and popped open about an inch. 

Inside the place was sort of Post modern and minimalist with expensive looking lights and a view to the financial district to the south.

How long have you lived here in San Francisco? I asked. About a year. I lived down in Menlo Park with my Dad before. I’m going to San Francisco State this year. And you can afford all this? Oh no my Dad was a VP at 3Com but when another company bought them he receive a large severance.

She went on, something about him working for another company that was bought out and another severance package but by then I was focused on the lights that seemed to be changing color. She poured some Bourbon in a couple of glasses for us. I said no thanks I’ve had enough. She persisted with the drink offer, and not wanting to look like a light weight. I tossed mine back. This stuff tasted terrible and I almost wanted to throw up but I kept it down.

Janice got on the phone and talked for a few minutes to some different  people she knew during which time I thought I might really have to throw up. I watched her face as she spoke and it seemed to be melting endlessly but never dissolving away.  When she was done she announced that some friends were coming over and the party would be here. The thought of that made me nervous for some reason. I didn’t feel like meeting new people. They would all know that I was on some kind of drug. They would just know.

I asked her where the bathroom was and she said that room right off the front door. I went in there and started heaving my guts before I could make it to the toilet or the tub. There was barf everywhere on the floor and up on the vanity and the sight & smell of it made me retch again. This time I made it to the bathtub.

Janice came in through the still open door and said what the hell? You are going to clean this up. My friends will be here soon. Clean it up understand? She went in the closet on the other side of the entryway and got some towels brought them in and threw them at me. She said wipe everything down & rinse those towels in the tub.

After I thought I was done, I asked her what do I do with these wet towels? She said to put them in the washing machine which was down near her bedroom in a room across the hall. I put the wet towels in the fancy front loader and noticed that my pants & shirt had barf on them as well, so I stopped off my clothes and put them in with the towels. I heard some people coming into the Condo while I was standing there and having nothing on but my underwear I went into her bedroom and got into the bed.

I was in there a while and then Janice came in and ripped the covers off of me and said you can’t get in my bed! I refused to get up so she started to punch me. Then one of her friends came in and the two of them grabbed me by the ankles and pulled me right out of the bed. someone else grabbed my arms and the tree of them carried me out of the condo down the hall and dropped me in the elevator. The guy that had carried me by the arms said  to me you have to go and then he pushed the button for the lobby.

When the doors opened in the Lobby I just ran outside, the door man said Hey come here! but I just kept running out into the drizzle. I ran to the parking garage and figured I could find a place to lay down for a while and figure out what to do next. Before long  a Police Cruiser came by and shone it’s light on me. I was cuffed and taken to  county Jail #1 for processing. I was released later that morning to the custody of my mother. The lecture I received from her the entire trip home was far worse than the sickness or the arrest I had already endured. And then when I got home I relived the entire thing in front of my Father.

I figured that my life as I knew it might be over at that point, but as with all things time passes and the old things fade away.

I work for the Pacific Stock Exchange now on Pine Street not far from the Condos on Washington & Battery. Whenever I pass close by I am reminded of that night. Occasionally I find myself in the Mission district and sometimes pass by that club on 16th Street. I have never been in the place since that night. 

I think back on that night as “The incident”  and to this day I cant stand the smell of bourbon. The taste of it produces a gagging reflex, which is unfortunate  because many of my colleges are fond of their aged whiskeys and bourbons and I find myself often declining an offered drink in a private office or after work.

I guess we all live and learn, and fortunately “The Incident” was more embarrassing than tragic. 




 

[DarkMonster620]

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA . . . .

So, this was the FB story  . . .

[Monsterlover]

The writing's not so bad

What's also funny is that while I've never had a night that completely paralleled this story, I've had a few nights that share striking similarities.

Including the back of the police car.

State, in my case

[koko64]

 

Sounds similar to my scotch incident 30 years ago.
Just the smell ,. Never again...

[Monsterlover]

Livers have long memories.

[koko64]

 

[LMT]

Livers have long memories.

NO tequila for me......  Especially not with a turkey leg.... after a LOT of beer......

[ducpainter]

Livers have long memories.

Not really.

[koko64]

  . For some.

[ducpainter]

I'm pretty sure Kevin coined a native American name for me this year at DIMBY.

[Monsterlover]

I'm pretty sure Kevin coined a native American name for me this year at DIMBY.

I don't recall this....

[Monsterlover]

Oh, Two Livers?

[ducpainter]

Oh, Two Livers?

[Monsterlover]

Drinks with two livers? 

I honestly am not remembering this well.

Oh, was it the three Horsemen of the Drunk-pocalypse?

You guys put forth one hell of an effort

[koko64]

Oh, Two Livers?