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Chuck Norris

Started by krolik, July 12, 2008, 08:55:45 AM

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SKOM

Chuck Norris counted to infinity.

7 times.  8)
"Die gefährlichste Weltanschauung ist die Weltanschauung derer, die die Welt nie angeschaut haben."
â€" Alexander Von Humboldt

A.duc.H.duc.

"Listen, not a year goes by, not a year, that I don't hear about some escalator accident involving some bastard kid which could have easily been avoided had some parent - I don't care which one - but some parent conditioned him to fear and respect that escalator."

KnightofNi

Chuck norris and Lance Armstrong were in a testicle counting contest. Chuck Norris won by 5.
Life, alas is very drear. Up with the glass and down with the beer!
Quote from: RB on September 09, 2009, 05:31:47 AM
Seriously, when i am 800years old i want to rock like Lemmy! it is a religion that requires lots of determination, drugs, and Marshall stacks.

now with clavicle of steel (stainless) wrist o' steel (11/2011)

lawbreaker

M.C Hammer found out the hard way that Chuck Norris can touch this....

ducpenguin

These are friggen hilarious!  People are starting to look at me weird; maybe I should only read these at home!

Google won't search for Chuck Norris because it knows you don't find Chuck Norris, he finds you.

Scottish

Chuck Norris died over 20 years ago....... Death is afraid to tell him.

Sinister

Chuck Norris let the dogs out, that's who.
"...but without a smiley, some people might think that sentence makes you look like a homophobic, inbred prick. I'm mean, it might leave the impression that you're a  douchebag or a dickhead, or maybe you need to get your head out of your ass."  DrunkenMonkey

"...any government that thinks war is somehow fair and subject to rules like a baseball game probably should not get into one." - Marcus Luttrell

spolic

Chuck Norris says "Screw the caribou, drill Alaska."

Don't believe me?  Look it up.
He man, where are all the ads?

Kyna

Chuck Norris' kidney is considered a concealed weapon in 50 states.
Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity. -Robert J. Hanlon

ducatiz

Check out my oil filter forensics thread!                     Offended? Click here
"Yelling out of cars, turning your speakers out the window to blast your music onto the street, setting off M-80 firecrackers, firing automatic weapons into the airâ€"these are all well and good. But none of them create a merry atmosphere of insouciance and bonhomie quite like a revving motorcycle.

Porsche Monkey

Chuck Norris killed two stones with one bird
Quote from: bobspapa on July 18, 2009, 04:40:31 PM
if I had a vagina...I'd never leave the house


SKOM

"Die gefährlichste Weltanschauung ist die Weltanschauung derer, die die Welt nie angeschaut haben."
â€" Alexander Von Humboldt

ducatiz

Quote from: SKOM on July 14, 2008, 12:14:05 PM
Really? You're going to try and turn a Chuck Norris thread into a political one?  [roll]

[puke]

where was your whinging when spolic posted this?

Quote from: spolic on July 14, 2008, 11:25:27 AM
Chuck Norris says "Screw the caribou, drill Alaska."

Don't believe me?  Look it up.
Check out my oil filter forensics thread!                     Offended? Click here
"Yelling out of cars, turning your speakers out the window to blast your music onto the street, setting off M-80 firecrackers, firing automatic weapons into the airâ€"these are all well and good. But none of them create a merry atmosphere of insouciance and bonhomie quite like a revving motorcycle.

SKOM

Quote from: ducatizzzz on July 14, 2008, 12:19:13 PM
where was your whinging when spolic posted this?


At least his included Chuck Norris.
"Die gefährlichste Weltanschauung ist die Weltanschauung derer, die die Welt nie angeschaut haben."
â€" Alexander Von Humboldt

ducatiz

Quote from: SKOM on July 14, 2008, 12:25:48 PM
At least his included Chuck Norris.

Mine did too, but you didn't bother noticing it.

Chuck Norris' breath made ANWR the shithole it is today.
Check out my oil filter forensics thread!                     Offended? Click here
"Yelling out of cars, turning your speakers out the window to blast your music onto the street, setting off M-80 firecrackers, firing automatic weapons into the airâ€"these are all well and good. But none of them create a merry atmosphere of insouciance and bonhomie quite like a revving motorcycle.