Quote from: triangleforge on February 26, 2016, 08:35:57 AM
Granted. And now you'll get to foresee every mistake you'll make from here on out and won't be able to do a damn thing about it.

I wish it was Spring Break already and I could get a week away from students.

POOF.. Granted.  You are now in a maximum security prison and someone spiked the water with viagra.

I wish this election season was over so we could BOHICA already.

zzzaapdingggg! Your wish is granted; howver, due to a highly polarized electorate and a series of unprecedented constitutional challenges before an evenly split Supreme Court, President Kanye and Vice President Bieber are sworn into office.

Following the election, I wish that could be granted political asylum on a beautiful island populated super-model native women that have low standards.

Quote from: Johnny OrganDonor on February 26, 2016, 10:31:36 AM
zzzaapdingggg! Your wish is granted; howver, due to a highly polarized electorate and a series of unprecedented constitutional challenges before an evenly split Supreme Court, President Kanye and Vice President Bieber are sworn into office.

Following the election, I wish that could be granted political asylum on a beautiful island populated super-model native women that have low standards.

Ding dong.. Your wish is granted.

You get political asylum on said island.  The incredibly beautiful native women all have horribly low standards.  So low, in fact, that you are generally considered out of their reach and they all are with guys that look like Ron Jeremy.    On a bad day.  Moreover, you don't speak the language and their dialect is so alien sounding that when you speak English to them, you sound mentally retarded.

I wish I had telekinesis. 

Quote from: ducatiz on February 26, 2016, 11:47:58 AM
Ding dong.. Your wish is granted.

You get political asylum on said island.  The incredibly beautiful native women all have horribly low standards.  So low, in fact, that you are generally considered out of their reach and they all are with guys that look like Ron Jeremy.    On a bad day.  Moreover, you don't speak the language and their dialect is so alien sounding that when you speak English to them, you sound mentally retarded.

I wish I had telekinesis. 

Granted, however every object you try to move ends up hurtling towards your forehead at the speed of a decent fast ball.

I wish I was a little bit taller.

Quote from: Monsterlover on February 27, 2016, 08:29:49 AM
Granted, however every object you try to move ends up hurtling towards your forehead at the speed of a decent fast ball.

I wish I was a little bit taller.

granted, but as a result of your 7'6" stature, you no longer fit in your bed, or your house.

i wish i still lived in colorado.

Your new home is Wray, Colorado - has the added benefit of being just a short walk to either Nebraska or Kansas.

(Monsterlover is lucky, you were too easy on him, I would've added 16" to his neck to give him his desired gain in stature)


I wish that I have read and fully understood all of the volumes of the Britannica Great Books of the Western World

Quote from: Johnny OrganDonor on February 27, 2016, 03:14:48 PM
Your new home is Wray, Colorado - has the added benefit of being just a short walk to either Nebraska or Kansas.

(Monsterlover is lucky, you were too easy on him, I would've added 16" to his neck to give him his desired gain in stature)


I wish that I have read and fully understood all of the volumes of the Britannica Great Books of the Western World

Granted, but you have no one to talk to about it as you're the last living human.

I wish I knew what I was thinking when I started this thread 8 years ago.

Being superstitious, you were hoping that you would never make the 666th reply.

I wish that I could reach a state of full Zen enlightenment and had no desire to wish for anything

Granted, only you've also become part of someone else's wish. They needed you to be an organ donor for them. Right now. They needed everything. Sorry.

I wish I could fly.

Boo-Bam!  Your wish is granted.

You can now fly.  In fact, you are a fly.

I wish I would bowl a 300 game today.

Granted - You bowl a perfect 300 using your nose to press the bowl button on your phone app. You are using your nose as you lost both arms after an altercation with a machete wielding midget who was offended when you bowled 113 and beat their 112.

I wish I had enough money to only work 1 day a week.

Quote from: Needle99 on February 28, 2016, 03:25:42 PM
Granted - You bowl a perfect 300 using your nose to press the bowl button on your phone app. You are using your nose as you lost both arms after an altercation with a machete wielding midget who was offended when you bowled 113 and beat their 112.

I wish I had enough money to only work 1 day a week.

Granted! You're a billionaire. But that one day? You spend it fending off the IRS, PTA, and all the other leeches who want a piece of your pie.

I wish I hadn't bought a 100 year old "fix-er-upper"

Quote from: herm on February 29, 2016, 08:56:28 PM
Granted! You're a billionaire. But that one day? You spend it fending off the IRS, PTA, and all the other leeches who want a piece of your pie.

I wish I hadn't bought a 100 year old "fix-er-upper"

Bing-bang!  Your wish is granted.

You now have a brand new house...




I would really love a back rub right now.

Quote from: Oldfisti on March 01, 2016, 05:11:27 PM

Bing-bang!  Your wish is granted.

You now have a brand new house...




I would really love a back rub right now.

Granted, Mamma June is on her way.

I wish I could shoot electricity from my finger tips.

Zap! Your fingertips now shoot lightening bolts.  Unfortunately, you now find that essential hygiene practices (washing your hands, picking your nose, etc) can be lethal and you fall into such a disgusting state that no one will ever come close enough to you to be in lightening bolt range.

I wish my fingers had a vibrate function that I could control.