Giving up

[Grampa]

Sometimes people are just going to do what they want.... and you can't do a damn thing to stop them.

A few years a go, my uncle ( a local well known pharmacist) met a woman at his church, and against the advice of his friends, he married her. Two weeks later he was broke because she had cleaned out all his accounts, and was left having to defend himself against abuse charges his new wife filed against him in an attempt to keep him out his house.  He went into hiding soon after he cleared up the legal mess. ( his ex kept his last name )

Two months ago Michelles dad (he's 83) met him just such a woman ( she's 66). (we met her today) Funny thing is..... this broad has pretty much been waving red flags the entire time he's know her.... but he refuses to see them. Last Wednesday..... he loaned/gave her 30k. He is by no means a wealthy man. He was all set to propose to her tonight.... but our untimely visit screwed that up She wanted and is getting an emerald engagement and wedding rings, and has asked him to buy a new house.

He won't listen to friends..... he won't listen to family.

So we who truely love and care for the old man... have to give up and accept.

She's a good Christian woman....and he trusts her. She gave him a picture of Jesus to carry around in his checkbook ..... I shit you not.


If anything happens....... I was on the DMF that night.




F'n humans.

[Grampa]

this might be my new stepsister.....


mom is 66 but looks like some 80yo bar-hag. Her last husband (#3 ) died shortly after being married..... their marrage was a business aggrement according to her. He was also in his 80s at the time, but lucky her..... he was bed ridden.

[Grampa]

and FYI..... dont use any of those $39.95 people info search sites



we wasted $39.95 today

[herm]

Joel,
you can lead a horse to water, but you cant make them drink.
unfortunately, you may end up watching them get dehydrated.

i have been in your shoes (my sister) and its no fun. best of luck to you and LM

[Monsterlover]

+1

Too bad things go like this sometimes.

[kopfjäger]

He's 83. If she makes him happy, good for him. Even if it's short lived.

[hooligan machinist]

He's 83. If she makes him happy, good for him. Even if it's short lived.

+1, went through a similar situation with my father a few years ago. No one approved of his new bride to be, we knew she was going after his $$. Voiceing our opinions only pissed him off.     Luckily he saw the light shortly after and told her she wasn't getting squat. They married anyway and she's actually turned into a pretty good stepmom.
My point is, don't meddle. He'll likely resent you for it. After all, he is a grown man and capable making his own decisions, even if they aren't wise.
Just my .02

[ducpainter]

I hate to say it Joel, but I agree with Kopf and HM.

To put it a little more harshly...

it's none of anyones' effing business.

[redxblack]

My dad is married to a horribly ugly person (not just the exterior, although that's certainly no prize winner either). At the end of the day, it's his choice, his life and he has to live next to that thing. The only thing that REALLY pisses me off is she intentionally feeds him crap that's not good for him (overweight w/ heart condition) and he eats it. It would be so much nicer if she'd just rob him than slowly kill him.

[teddy037.2]

that's why I stay broke.

I'm totally stealth on the gold diggin' radar  

[Grampa]

I hate to say it Joel, but I agree with Kopf and HM.

To put it a little more harshly...

it's none of anyones' effing business.

On one hand I agree. I just spent a few hours talking to him..... some concerns are a lil clearer.  cept the money issue.

My biggest concern is...... seeing all of the familys hard work....be handed to trash.   Sure...yer 83 pay for some fun, but if yor money goes to give some POS 30year old hobag a free ride in beauty school... make the beast with two backs that.

Its his money .... he should be spending it anyway he wants. He kinda knows he's payed for some attention, but we as his family want to know he was a lil something left in reserve for a "what if" or funeral costs.

[Popeye the Sailor]

Its his money .... he should be spending it anyway he wants. He kinda knows he's payed for some attention, but we as his family want to know he was a lil something left in reserve for a "what if" or funeral costs.

You worry too much.


Make his wife pay for it all-it'll be her responsibility.



People will do what they want, especially fully grown men. You're only hope is that there's an open bar at the wedding.




Although if you *really* want to stop it, go ahead and try and get him declared incompetent. I doubt you'd be any happier though.

[Grampa]

the bar is alway open

[TiNi]

it's disturbing to watch someone you care about make a mistake...
but there is nothing you should say to get in the way of their happiness.

be there for him, that is all you can do 

[Big Troubled Bear]

He` s the one that needs to be happy, at least for a while