Can't get it up

Drunken Monkey · December 11, 2009, 08:47:22 AM

For some weird reason I've lost the ability to get and sustain a wheelie.

When I was 19 I could pop a wheelie dozen of times a day, and even had issues with wheeling too much. But now I'm middle aged, and can't seem to muster the front wheel off the ground with the same abandon that I used to.

Maybe it's having kids. Something about being responsible for a pair of rugrats has diminished my desire for wheelies?

Anyone planning a wheelie clinic anytime soon? I need some therapy...

Spidey · December 11, 2009, 08:52:40 AM

I'm in the same boat. $:-\$ I'm going through a wheelie slump.

Wait a sec. Don't you have a 'tad now? You're having problems with wheelies?!? I gotta borrow datv's husky and we can go practice.

[moto]

Le Piou · December 11, 2009, 08:59:51 AM

I would like to join the therapy, although my problem is slightly different: I don't dare to wheelie the 998.

This bike scares me... $:-\$

mostrobelle · December 11, 2009, 09:00:18 AM

Perhaps it's a trust issue? Have you tried wheeling around your wife? Maybe mix things up and have someone else join you in your wheelie efforts or try a new position to loft it up. Maybe you should seek the counsel of a professional, someone who really knows what they're doing when it comes to wheelies? There are clinics for this--expensive, but fun and worth it. I trust you've addressed the fitness aspect of this already--carrying too much weight, especially in front, can inhibit one's ability to wheelie or so I've heard.

GEEZER · December 11, 2009, 09:15:55 AM

God, I'm so glad SOMEONE is finally talking about it!!!
Middle age, kids, therapy, overweight, can't get it up...wait...we're talking bikes, right?

desmoquattro · December 11, 2009, 09:25:04 AM

Here's a quick cure:

1) Start 10 feet from a wall.
2) DO NOT wear a helmet.
3) Run, full speed, towards the wall.
4) Make sure your head takes the brunt of the impact.

I do this daily, and my wheelies are awesome...

But seriously...I'd love a wheelie clinic. But our normal secret wheelie spot is being patrolled more frequently by the

. Happy to show up, with the Supersport, and participate. Especially if someone lets me ride a 'tard

Drunken Monkey · December 11, 2009, 11:26:48 AM

Warning: Ask your doctor if you are healthy enough for a wheelie. Wheelies lasting longer than 4 hours are a serious mental condition and signs of a potential "whiskey throttle" affliction; the patient should seek immediate mental assistance to avoid 'dry sump' damage and/or license loss.

desmoquattro · December 11, 2009, 11:38:38 AM

Quote from: Drunken Monkey on December 11, 2009, 11:26:48 AM
Warning: Ask your doctor if you are healthy enough for a wheelie. Wheelies lasting longer than 4 hours are a serious mental condition and signs of a potential "whiskey throttle" affliction; the patient should seek immediate mental assistance to avoid 'dry sump' damage and/or license loss.

Those disclaimers always crack me up. If I have an erection lasting more than four hours, I'm calling a prostitute...not a doctor.

Popeye the Sailor · December 11, 2009, 11:48:08 AM

Quote from: desmoquattro on December 11, 2009, 11:38:38 AM

Those disclaimers always crack me up. If I have an erection lasting more than four hours, I'm calling a prostitute...not a doctor.

Idk-I could see going to a hospital for it. I suppose you'd get the head nurse.

jimboecv · December 11, 2009, 12:46:55 PM

Classic-Thread Status has been reached.

Thank you to all who've contributed.

Now back to our normal thread-jack.

Drunken Monkey · December 11, 2009, 01:24:30 PM

Quote from: mostrobelle on December 11, 2009, 09:00:18 AM
Perhaps it's a trust issue? ... Maybe mix things up and have someone else join you in your wheelie efforts or try a new position to loft it up.

Well, I recently got involved with a younger, more energetic motorcycle in an attempt to cure my inability to wheelie, but I've found that all this new bike does is further my doubts as to my abilities. Worse, I should be able to wheelie this new bike with ease. This is leading to all sorts of performance anxiety, including wheeling by accident (or prematurely, if you will.)

Spidey · December 11, 2009, 01:33:21 PM

Does your Chromo know about your new bike? Or are you keeping it in someone else's garage and telling 'il Shiny that you are "walking" to work. Not that I can blame ya. Cuz no matter how many aftermarket mods install on 'il Shiny (often leading to that 'shiny' aftermarket look), she's still an older bike.

desmoquattro · December 11, 2009, 01:37:37 PM

Quote from: Spidey on December 11, 2009, 01:33:21 PM
Does your Chromo know about your new bike? Or are you keeping it in someone else's garage and telling 'il Shiny that you are "walking" to work. Not that I can blame ya. Cuz no matter how many aftermarket mods install on 'il Shiny (often leading to that 'shiny' aftermarket look), she's still an older bike.

They're always fun at first, but after a while they spend a lot of time in the shop.

mostrobelle · December 11, 2009, 01:41:54 PM

Quote from: Drunken Monkey on December 11, 2009, 01:24:30 PM
Well, I recently got involved with a younger, more energetic motorcycle in an attempt to cure my inability to wheelie, but I've found that all this new bike does is further my doubts as to my abilities. Worse, I should be able to wheelie this new bike with ease. This is leading to all sorts of performance anxiety, including wheeling by accident (or prematurely, if you will.)

We might be onto something here. I think guilt is the issue. Not that I'm condoning your inability to stay faithful to one true love, but perhaps confronting the first and assuaging your guilt with a purchase of some bling/something shiny/farkle for it will help ease your mind.

Spidey · December 11, 2009, 02:02:01 PM

Uh . . . Pics or it didn't happen?

News:

Can't get it up