The Official No One Gives a Sh*t Thread

[elyse]

After this job you should try working for the federal government.

ive been here 9 1/2 years..its similar in its efficiency to the feds

[elyse]

STUPID STUPID STUPID AMENDMENTS!!!!

[LMT]

My arms are like wet noodles. All the bookcases at work were bolted to the wall and together. Some had 3 in carriage bolts while others had 2 1/2 screws. Almost all were stripped. I brought in the Saw saw!

[Randimus Maximus]

The NHL & NHLPA have FINALLY reached an agreement on a new CBA.

[brimo]

Made silly relatively harmless mistake at work easily fixed no harm done, no-one would have given a shit other than that the people we contract to (government types) found out about it and made a big deal out of it to big note themselves and make the evil "contractor" look bad. They had a go at management who should have told them to make the beast with two backs off but instead I have now had to explain myself.

[Stella]

I have to share an office now which I typically don't mind at all since I'm on the road a lot and its nice to have the synergy of coworkers (usually) when I'm in.   However the 70-ish y/o man im now co-habitating wirh apologizes for EVERYTHING.  And it's only been one day.  Trying to tell him that whatever he's apologizing for is a non-issue such as:

Him:  I'll help you move that piece of paper of yours on your desk.
Me: oh that's ok, I'm right here I can put it in my folder after I'm done with it.
Him:  well I'm sorry for meddling in your business then...


Him: you know you have messages on your phone.
Me:  yes thanks I listened to them remotely, there are things I need to retrieve from them yet.
Him:  well I'm sorry for being so nosey...

And so it goes.

[Bick]

I have to share an office now which I typically don't mind at all since I'm on the road a lot and its nice to have the synergy of coworkers (usually) when I'm in.   However the 70-ish y/o man im now co-habitating wirh apologizes for EVERYTHING.  And it's only been one day.  Trying to tell him that whatever he's apologizing for is a non-issue such as:

Him:  I'll help you move that piece of paper of yours on your desk.
Me: oh that's ok, I'm right here I can put it in my folder after I'm done with it.
Him:  well I'm sorry for meddling in your business then...


Him: you know you have messages on your phone.
Me:  yes thanks I listened to them remotely, there are things I need to retrieve from them yet.
Him:  well I'm sorry for being so nosey...

And so it goes.

My dad got a job?!!!

[Stella]

 

[AdmiralKit]

If you live in Western Kentucky and have Time Warner as your cable provider... sorry about that outage during the game.  I swear it wasn't my fault.

[Stella]

You can't beat this message after a tough day: 

"I wish I could get you some chicken soup . Love ya lots , Pop"

[77south]

I'm getting married in May, so money is tight.  And naturally my 2000 impala with 162000 miles has decided to destroy its transmission slowly, and since it has a blue book value in excellent condition of $1400 (and it isn't in excellent condition) and since all of the repair quotes I have gotten are around $2800 I am in the market for a different car.  One of my best friends that I have known since college has offered to sell me his 2002 Sebring with a bunch of miles on it and a dent or two for $1000 and whatever it cost to fix the tie rod and ball joint.  Both of us thought this would be $400-$500.  He got the fix done with the understanding that I would buy the car, and the fix came in at $900.  So now the Sebring costs $1900 which is less of a good deal, but I did say I would buy the car, and he would have simply traded the car in next month unfixed, if I hadn't wanted to buy it.  My fiancee now thinks that buying the car is a bad idea, and should be conditional on passing an independent mechanic's assessment.  She may be right, but I can't tell my friend 'no deal' and leave him on the hook for an otherwise unnecessary $900 repair bill.  And of course last night when he was going to bring the car over, the battery died.  And my friend wants me to buy and charge a new battery which he will deduct from the purchase price of the Sebring. 

At this point once I have paid for it, I half expect the Sebring to explode the first time I try to start it while my fiancee points and says "I told you so."

[zooom]

I'm getting married in May, so money is tight.  And naturally my 2000 impala with 162000 miles has decided to destroy its transmission slowly, and since it has a blue book value in excellent condition of $1400 (and it isn't in excellent condition) and since all of the repair quotes I have gotten are around $2800 I am in the market for a different car.  One of my best friends that I have known since college has offered to sell me his 2002 Sebring with a bunch of miles on it and a dent or two for $1000 and whatever it cost to fix the tie rod and ball joint.  Both of us thought this would be $400-$500.  He got the fix done with the understanding that I would buy the car, and the fix came in at $900.  So now the Sebring costs $1900 which is less of a good deal, but I did say I would buy the car, and he would have simply traded the car in next month unfixed, if I hadn't wanted to buy it.  My fiancee now thinks that buying the car is a bad idea, and should be conditional on passing an independent mechanic's assessment.  She may be right, but I can't tell my friend 'no deal' and leave him on the hook for an otherwise unnecessary $900 repair bill.  And of course last night when he was going to bring the car over, the battery died.  And my friend wants me to buy and charge a new battery which he will deduct from the purchase price of the Sebring. 

At this point once I have paid for it, I half expect the Sebring to explode the first time I try to start it while my fiancee points and says "I told you so."

gas can and a pack of matches should fix either car rather easily!

[elyse]

I'm getting married in May, so money is tight.  And naturally my 2000 impala with 162000 miles has decided to destroy its transmission slowly, and since it has a blue book value in excellent condition of $1400 (and it isn't in excellent condition) and since all of the repair quotes I have gotten are around $2800 I am in the market for a different car.  One of my best friends that I have known since college has offered to sell me his 2002 Sebring with a bunch of miles on it and a dent or two for $1000 and whatever it cost to fix the tie rod and ball joint.  Both of us thought this would be $400-$500.  He got the fix done with the understanding that I would buy the car, and the fix came in at $900.  So now the Sebring costs $1900 which is less of a good deal, but I did say I would buy the car, and he would have simply traded the car in next month unfixed, if I hadn't wanted to buy it.  My fiancee now thinks that buying the car is a bad idea, and should be conditional on passing an independent mechanic's assessment.  She may be right, but I can't tell my friend 'no deal' and leave him on the hook for an otherwise unnecessary $900 repair bill.  And of course last night when he was going to bring the car over, the battery died.  And my friend wants me to buy and charge a new battery which he will deduct from the purchase price of the Sebring. 

At this point once I have paid for it, I half expect the Sebring to explode the first time I try to start it while my fiancee points and says "I told you so."

if your friend & you were both under the impression it would cost $400 to $500 to fix & then that fix costs double & your friend pays for it....unless your friend talked to you about the additional cost BEFORE the fix was done..then that cost is on him... i understand not wanting to screw over a friend, but from the sounds of it, that might be what he's trying to do to you...cause if you check the blue book value, even in excellent condition, its not worth $1900.00....sooooo, you may want to rethink your position...

if a mod happens to read this..yeah, yeah, i know it's nogas, but sometimes people just have to pass gas 

[ZLTFUL]

I can now understand where the term "going postal" comes from.
I understand it was from the overworked/underpaid/more likely to kill you in a shooting spree postal carriers and post office workers...but the reasons for driving someone postal seem to saturate all agencies of the federal government.

This morning, 3 different branch chiefs come to my desk telling me that they each have a new employee starting tomorrow.

Branch Chief #1: "I have new employee R2D2 starting this week. I have all of their hardware and account requests submitted and completed. All of the equipment is in the cubicle they will be in. Please set it up and verify it is all working."

Me: Sure thing.

Branch Chief #2: "C3PO starts tomorrow. Do you have their account info and new laptop? Is it all set up?"

Me: I don't see a ticket from you on this...

Branch Chief #2: Oh...I am supposed to do that? Show me where and how? I have never had to do it like this before...

Me: Well this is the process how it was presented to me. I will help out whereever I can.

Branch Chief #3: New employee meet Ryan. New employee starts today. I didn't see their laptop or account credentials.

Me: Did you submit a ticket for the new account and one for new hardware?

Branch Chief #3: Nope...Why don't you do that for me?

Me: Because as the hiring manager, it is your responsibility to verify that all clearance requirements have been met and that the user account ticket and new hardware ticket are submitted.

Branch Chief #3: You can do that for me.

Me: I can't. It is against USDA regulations for me, as a contractor and not a federal employee to submit ANY access or account requests. Only the hiring manager and USDA HR can make those requests.

Branch Chief #3: Who told you that? What's your boss' name and number??!


Just so effing annoying that 2 out of 3 ignore established procedures because the person previously in my role would do everything for them against the policies.

[zooom]

sounds like #3 is looking to get themself put out of a job by reporting the malfeasance...

#2 sounds aloof to various pieces of their job, but not apposed to actually doing them...

I'd say that you should spend as much time handling requests for #1 as possible so as to be too occupied to pay any level of attention to #3 !!!