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Mr Cheeks' revenge on the yellow pages

Started by Monsterlover, April 21, 2012, 05:08:29 PM

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Monsterlover

April 21, 2012, 05:08:29 PM Last Edit: April 21, 2012, 05:10:58 PM by Monsterlover
Or my revenge. He just helped.

Allow me to explain.

I got an "urgent" letter (at the shop) wanting $229 per quarter to list my company on the net. I had to work to find that (tiny printed) cost.

As is my normal custom when I get irritated enough at a company that includes a "business reply mail" envelope, I stuff it full of crap and mail it back sans my name.

One of my cats, Mr Cheeks (so named for his whisker area being a little on the fat side, which I find hilarious) is of the long hair variety. We use clippers to shear him (not to the skin) to reduce the volume a little. Keeps his plumbing working and surprises on our floors to a minimum.  The fact that he lets us do this to him blows me away. When I first got him (he was a stray) it took the vet and three techs with welding gloves to handle him.

We had just giving him his summer trim just a few days ago. I stuffed the fur in a bag to contain it and decided it would make the perfect donation to the yellow page scam bastards trying to make off with my cash.









"The Vincent was like a bullet that went straight; the Ducati is like the magic bullet in Dallas that went sideways and hit JFK and the Governor of Texas at the same time."--HST    **"A man who works with his hands is a laborer.  A man who works with his hands and his brain is a craftsman.  A man who works with his hands, brains, and heart is an artist."  -Louis Nizer**

Randimus Maximus

#1
April 21, 2012, 05:23:03 PM
Beautiful!  [thumbsup]

And you're helping the USPS stay in business while you are at it.

A win-win!  ;D

Monsterlover

#2
April 21, 2012, 05:27:49 PM
[laugh]

[evil]
"The Vincent was like a bullet that went straight; the Ducati is like the magic bullet in Dallas that went sideways and hit JFK and the Governor of Texas at the same time."--HST    **"A man who works with his hands is a laborer.  A man who works with his hands and his brain is a craftsman.  A man who works with his hands, brains, and heart is an artist."  -Louis Nizer**

kopfjäger

#3
April 21, 2012, 05:45:02 PM
Make sure they can't trace it back, uncle sugar don't like folks make the beast with two backsing with the mail.  ;)
“Woohoohoohoo! Two personal records! For breath holding and number of sharks shot in the frickin\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\

Monsterlover

#4
April 21, 2012, 05:47:08 PM
Someone would really care?
"The Vincent was like a bullet that went straight; the Ducati is like the magic bullet in Dallas that went sideways and hit JFK and the Governor of Texas at the same time."--HST    **"A man who works with his hands is a laborer.  A man who works with his hands and his brain is a craftsman.  A man who works with his hands, brains, and heart is an artist."  -Louis Nizer**

kopfjäger

#5
April 21, 2012, 05:49:44 PM
Quote from: Monsterlover on April 21, 2012, 05:47:08 PM
Someone would really care?

I would say yes, but I'm not a Postal Inspector.
“Woohoohoohoo! Two personal records! For breath holding and number of sharks shot in the frickin\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\

Dannyboy

#6
April 21, 2012, 06:44:25 PM
Uncle Sugar has already gotten his money out of it.

Speedbag

#7
April 21, 2012, 07:04:15 PM
 ;D
I tend to regard most of humanity as little more than walking talking dilated sphincters. - Rat

The Architect

#8
April 22, 2012, 04:12:17 AM
Awsome!

I once mailed them (the internet advertisers) an invoice for my time reading and dealing with their bs.  They claimed I owed them money.

I never received a payment? 

AdmiralKit

#9
April 23, 2012, 09:52:22 AM
I own a couple of domains, and nothing sends me into a frothing rage quite like those jackasses who send me envelopes with "IMPORTANT BILLING INFORMATION ENCLOSED!!1!1eleventy!!" on the front which look just like an invoice but is actually their way of getting me to sign up for their SEO services.  All over the letter it says "AMOUNT DUE BY XX/XX/XX! PAY NOW TO AVOID A LATE FEE!"  You have to read all over it very carefully to find the sentence in extremely small type that says, "This is not actually an invoice, but if you pay the amount listed, it will constitute your acceptance of our service agreement and you will be billed regularly for this."

I'd like to apply the business end of a 2x4 to those parasites.

Monsterlover

#10
April 23, 2012, 01:00:43 PM
Want me to send you some cat hair?
"The Vincent was like a bullet that went straight; the Ducati is like the magic bullet in Dallas that went sideways and hit JFK and the Governor of Texas at the same time."--HST    **"A man who works with his hands is a laborer.  A man who works with his hands and his brain is a craftsman.  A man who works with his hands, brains, and heart is an artist."  -Louis Nizer**

jaxduc

#11
April 23, 2012, 01:19:03 PM
Quote from: Monsterlover on April 21, 2012, 05:08:29 PM
As is my normal custom when I get irritated enough at a company that includes a "business reply mail" envelope, I stuff it full of crap and mail it back sans my name.
Genius Lloyd!
[evil] [clap]
Quote
Aren't you the Panigale hater?

Speedbag

#12
April 23, 2012, 02:51:50 PM
Quote from: Monsterlover on April 23, 2012, 01:00:43 PM
Want me to send you some cat hair?

+1

I could supply you nearly weekly....
I tend to regard most of humanity as little more than walking talking dilated sphincters. - Rat

Monsterlover

#13
April 23, 2012, 03:23:13 PM
[laugh]
"The Vincent was like a bullet that went straight; the Ducati is like the magic bullet in Dallas that went sideways and hit JFK and the Governor of Texas at the same time."--HST    **"A man who works with his hands is a laborer.  A man who works with his hands and his brain is a craftsman.  A man who works with his hands, brains, and heart is an artist."  -Louis Nizer**

ducatiz

#14
April 23, 2012, 03:36:05 PM
as long as you don't put bodily fluids or poo in the envelope you are OK.

you can also tape the envelope to a brick.  they will pay full first class rates to ship themselves a brick.

axe me how i know.
Check out my oil filter forensics thread!                     Offended? Click here
"Yelling out of cars, turning your speakers out the window to blast your music onto the street, setting off M-80 firecrackers, firing automatic weapons into the airâ€"these are all well and good. But none of them create a merry atmosphere of insouciance and bonhomie quite like a revving motorcycle.
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