Corrupt a wish

[ducatiz]

your wish comes true... you are in aruba, you have a fantastic oceanside lunch and cocktail with some really nice people, but get so sunburned during it that you spend the rest of your time there in your room, alone, shivering and crying.

i wish i didn't sunburn so easily 

ping, you don't sunburn at all.  in fact, the tanned leather you call skin is so think and tough it is bullet proof.  however, it makes life hard as people think you are a walking beef jerky and women find your skin horribly repulsive.   you have to exfoliate hourly or you can't move any of your joints due to leather build-up.

i wish i could teleport myself or anything else perfectly to anywhere and back.

[tommys67]

i wish i could teleport myself or anything else perfectly to anywhere and back.

Granted, but your stay in any one place is limited to just 4.2 seconds.

I wish I could start my day without coffee!

[ducatiz]

Granted, but your stay in any one place is limited to just 4.2 seconds.

I wish I could start my day without coffee!

  granted, but now you must start your day with haloperidol administered by these guys in white with a giant horse needle.  they loosen the straight jacket before shooting you up.

i wish this thread hadn't jumped the shark.

[faolan01]

  granted, but now you must start your day with haloperidol administered by these guys in white with a giant horse needle.  they loosen the straight jacket before shooting you up.

i wish this thread hadn't jumped the shark.

granted...the thread didn't jump the shark, it screwed the pooch


I wish I had more Woodchuck Cider

[NuTTs]

I wish I had more Woodchuck Cider

Granted. You have all the woodchuck cider that could chuck wood BUUUUUUT, it flows freely out the front end of a giant tranny called Bubba-Charlene.. and it´s bitter.

I wish I hadn´t had soooo much beer tonight

[faolan01]

Granted. You have all the woodchuck cider that could chuck wood BUUUUUUT, it flows freely out the front end of a giant tranny called Bubba-Charlene.. and it´s bitter.

I wish I hadn´t had soooo much beer tonight

granted, you had no beer tonight. nor will you ever have beer again due to a bizzar medical condition that causes your throat to swell shut at the slightest hint of alcohol.

I wish my bike was paid off so I could spend the money on mods and track days

[krolik]

Poof!  Your bike is paid off, but it's stolen the next day, after you forgot to renew your insurance.

I wish i didn't have to go to work tomorrow.

[BWClark]

Poof!  Your bike is paid off, but it's stolen the next day, after you forgot to renew your insurance.

I wish i didn't have to go to work tomorrow.

You don't, because you were fired yesterday for gross incompetence. Turns out you're unemployable.

I wish I was CEO of a big successful multinational with a fantastic pay package and a nice multimillion dollar severance package if things go bad....

[Drunken Monkey]

I wish I was CEO of a big successful multinational with a fantastic pay package and a nice multimillion dollar severance package if things go bad....

Granted, but you're Richard Corey

I wish I had an Orgasmatron, from the movie Sleeper.

[TiNi]

I wish I had an Orgasmatron, from the movie Sleeper.

you have one in your bedroom, that you use 3 times a day, alone.
the device has made you impotent, and has given you perma-grin.

i wish my fiancée had a 998 instead of a triumph

[NuTTs]

you have one in your bedroom, that you use 3 times a day, alone.
the device has made you impotent, and has given you perma-grin.

i wish my fiancée had a 998 instead of a triumph

Your wish is my command.. [poof], your fiancee has a 998.. that is painted metalflake pink and has a SV650 engine and was converted into a trike as a birthday present.

I wish I was enjoying a snow cone right now

[BWClark]

I wish I was enjoying a snow cone right now

Abra-ca-frickin-dabra! Here's your snow cone, pee flavored like from the Jackass movie or whatever. I can't believe you're enjoying that. Gross.

I wish I had prepared Nutts's snow cone...

[Porsche Monkey]

Granted. You have your snow cone. Unfortunatly you can't eat it because your face is a swollen bloody mess and need it as an ice pack instead. That's what you get for destroying a pristine 998 and turning it into a trike.

I wish I had a steak breakfast.

[BWClark]

I wish I had a steak breakfast.

Granted, you have a steak breakfast with a pee flavored snow cone on the side that I prepared for Nutts and you. It's melted a little and run around the steak. I hope that's cool.

I wish porschaholic would turn on his "Notify me of posts during reply" warning so he could play this game better....      

[TiNi]

Your wish is my command.. [poof], your fiancee has a 998.. that is painted metalflake pink and has a SV650 engine and was converted into a trike as a birthday present.

I wish I was enjoying a snow cone right now

you've got your snowcone... but you're eating it at the north pole and it's -80°F, all you are wearing is a pink speedo  

i wish i had a beach house to share with my friends, dmfers and family.
somewhere where the climate is ALWAYS spectacular, no hurricanes or big storms.
there is a full time chef and bartender, and an endless supply of good food and cocktails.