Corrupt a wish

[Drunken Monkey]

I wish Toby Keith sang like Alvin, of Alvin and the Chipmunks

Granted. Unfortunately his songs get stuck in your head, driving you permanently insane.

I wish I had a Klondike bar, right now.

[Grampa]

Granted. Unfortunately his songs get stuck in your head, driving you permanently insane.

I wish I had a Klondike bar, right now.

granted.... but the wish orders are transcribed into Inuit, and a lil something is lost in translation. You are transported to a gay bay called the Lone Dyke.


I wish I had a bowl of Capt'n Crunch right now.

[toaster]

you can, but you can only look at it.

i wish i could afford another ducati.

[ducatiz]

you can, but you can only look at it.

i wish i could afford another ducati.

PING.. you can, but you can only buy a 350 GTL

i wish my kid's shit didn't smell so bad (he's 10 months old, diapers are HAZMAT)

[Grampa]

PING.. you can, but you can only buy a 350 GTL

i wish my kid's shit didn't smell so bad (he's 10 months old, diapers are HAZMAT)

Poof..... it now smells like Gina Gershon. Now you have the paparazzi beating down your door everytime the baby shits.


I wish I was a monkey.

[Porsche Monkey]

Poof..... it now smells like Gina Gershon. Now you have the paparazzi beating down your door everytime the baby shits.


I wish I was a monkey.

Granted    You are the only straight monkey in a pack of homosexual monkeys.  You are also the smallest and slowest monkey but unfortunatly have the most desireable monkey arse. 


I wish for invincibility

[ducatiz]

Poof..... it now smells like Gina Gershon. Now you have the paparazzi beating down your door everytime the baby shits.

that's awesome!  thankugawd!!

[Grampa]

that's awesome!  thankugawd!!

maybe...just maybe...Gina smells like ass and cat food 

[KnightofNi]

Granted    You are the only straight monkey in a pack of homosexual monkeys.  You are also the smallest and slowest monkey but unfortunatly have the most desireable monkey arse. 


I wish for invincibility

you're invicible. you're also a looney that looses his arms and legs and in order to continue fighting has to bite people's legs off at the knees.



i wish i had a better wish.

[Grampa]

your wish for a better wish is granted. You now have the strength of Richard Simmons.



I wish I was bullet proof

[KnightofNi]

your wish for a better wish is granted. You now have the strength of Richard Simmons.



I wish I was bullet proof

awesome, i now have the strength to get fat housewives from middle america to love me.

you are bulletproof, but not waterproof. the added weight of the bulletproofing is too much for you to keep afloat and you drown.



i still wish my co-worker could hold a semi- intelligent conversation.

[A.B]

your co-worker is a brilliant conversationalist, who has the most profound things to say, but everytime you talk to him, just before he's about to blow your mind you are stricken with uncontrollable explosive diarrhea.

i wish i was the greatest songwriter that ever lived.

[ducatiz]

awesome, i now have the strength to get fat housewives from middle america to love me.

you are bulletproof, but not waterproof. the added weight of the bulletproofing is too much for you to keep afloat and you drown.



i still wish my co-worker could hold a semi- intelligent conversation.

ping!  done, but now you are always wrong and he is always right!

i wish i could control traffic and make everyone who keeps changing lanes (and their cars) disappear and re-appear in some village of cannibals.

[KnightofNi]

your co-worker is a brilliant conversationalist, who has the most profound things to say, but everytime you talk to him, just before he's about to blow your mind you are stricken with uncontrollable explosive diarrhea.

i wish i was the greatest songwriter that ever lived.

the co-worker is a female. and i usually do have explosive diarreha once a week. (sorry, TMI?  )

[TiNi]

the co-worker is a female. and i usually do have explosive diarreha once a week. (sorry, TMI?  )

TMI is right travis... you killed the game...