Forced with this decision, what do you do?

[psycledelic]

I have run into this type of scenerio a couple of times lately.  For the most part I have went back and forth between options one and two (saving option 3 for that one part that I really want).  Well, the time has come and I am about to go against the grain and pull the trigger, firing the shot that will quite possibly cause WWIII at home.  Just curious as to how other would react it they were in the same situation. 

[Oldfisti]

How does the saying go? "It is easier to beg for forgiveness than to ask permission in the first place." Something along those lines. Don't listen to me though, I'm single! 

[herm]

follow the military moto..

"dont ask, dont tell."

[lethe]

Deny, deny, deny!
"Honey, I have no clue how these parts got ordered! It must've been some good samaritan."

[OwnyTony]

with the economy the way it is, i think it will be harder to beg for forgiveness.  And its not important how you view the state of the economy, it is how your wife views it.

Personally, i think we are fine.  Business cycle

[Desmo Demon]

Anything that costs over $100, I generally run it past the wife first. We are married and we need to consider the other's opinion if a larger purchase is to be made. Fortuntely, we have the same opinion on motorcycle "upgrades" these days......they aren't worth it to us. We'd rather use that money for gas and tires and ride our bikes.

[superjohn]

Well, I guess it depends on how much you like your marriage. If you want to keep it, I'd suggest coming to some compromise with the wife and take some of the money you have and put it away for said upgrade with the agreement that you will add so much per week/month/whatever until you have saved enough for it.

If you've got your eye on a little honey down at the neighborhood pub though, go ahead and buy it and tell the wife you'll do whatever you want 

[SaltLick]

Best way ive found is this:

You spend $100 on a part, she gets $100 to spend on whatever she wants.

You spend $300 on a part, she gets the same amount to spend.

If you cant afford $600 total outgoing ($300 for the both of you) then you cant afford to buy your part.

We both make the same amount of money, and both add it to the kitty. So its not fair for me to spend that money but she cant??? get it?

[Popeye the Sailor]

I'd say keeping the wife happy is more important than new shiny bits for the bike.

[stopintime]

I think SaltLick has it figured out.

As a single guy I will vote for # 3 and I would like to think that a good woman will like you for being passionate about something/anything - the opposite of being boring and predictable? Of course, as a single guy I might very well be proven to not understand what I'm talking about - at all!

What is it we're talking about?

[DRKWNG]

Before I cast a vote, what is the part you want and how much is it?  I also agree with the logic that Saltlick laid down if both parties of the marriage contribute equally to the funds.

Deny, deny, deny!
"Honey, I have no clue how these parts got ordered! It must've been some good samaritan."

Or you could always take this road.  After all, it worked for GW for the last eight years...

[Statler]

We tend to talk about everything anyway.   It's our money and finances, not my money and finances.

We somewhat jokingly use the $100 rule too...anything over 100 bucks needs at least a phone call.

It's never a question of 'letting' someone buy something...it's a discussion of what we can afford and what our priorities are.    We're good about listening to what the other person wants to be happy even if it's pricey (My EVO subscription is not cheap but it's a good read and makes me happy...for example).

If there's something I really want that's not quite in the budget, we'll talk about it and I'll pick up some extra work to pay for it without effecting the rest of the finances....and vice versa.  G has done extra shifts to get something fun for herself.

The thought of just buying it outright would never even cross my mind.

[lauramonster]

Does she ask your permission when she buys new clothes and spend over $100?  Don't want to get picky, but the rules have to go both ways.  Hubby bought parts for the warrior, and although I didn't think it was worth $250.00, he says nothing when I've bought $150.00 in clothes.  Gotta go both ways, not just when you want something. 

The most important thing is "can you both afford it?"  Why is she saying no? 

Not enough details to recommend and opinion.

[Statler]

of course.

I am surprised at how many people don't actually do a budget.    How much goes to expenses, how much to savings, etc.etc.     Most people can't say how much their food budget is for a month, or gas, or heating/cooling the house.....

And when in a relationship that budget is for both of you.

So it's not difficult to agree on the 'fun' category.    Outside of essentials, how much goes to fun stuff for the family where everyone gets a say and how much goes to each person's fun budget with no questions asked on where it goes.    If I want to blow my amount on the bike, fine...on cigars, fine..etc.etc.

communication, saving marriages since...well...a long time.

[Statler]

oh...and we need more info about the stuff in question...otherwise this is just another relationship thread for no moto content section.